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▲Reforming English Spelling (blog.oup.com)
java-man 3 hours ago [-]
Yep.

  For example, in Year 1 that useless letter "c" would be dropped to be replased either by "k" or "s", and likewise "x" would no longer be part of the alphabet. The only kase in which "c" would be retained would be the "ch" formation, which will be dealt with later. Year 2 might reform "w" spelling, so that "which" and "one" would take the same konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish "y" replasing it with "i" and Iear 4 might fiks the "g/j" anomali wonse and for all.

  Jenerally, then, the improvement would kontinue iear bai iear with Iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and Iears 6-12 or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeining voist and unvoist konsonants. Bai Iear 15 or sou, it wud fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi ridandant letez "c", "y" and "x" -- bai now jast a memori in the maindz ov ould doderez -- tu riplais "ch", "sh", and "th" rispektivli.

  Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.
http://www.i18nguy.com/twain.html
dang 15 minutes ago [-]
Not Mark Twain, but (believe it or not) Dolton Edwards in Astounding Science Fiction, Sept 1946.

"Dolton" was an amusing pseudonym. See this thread from a few years ago:

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=23587507

cyberax 9 minutes ago [-]
> Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.

It actually looks pretty good. It's written for comical effect, but it highlights nicely how _bad_ English orthography is.

10 minutes ago [-]
excannuk 8 minutes ago [-]
[dead]
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